Bringing My Best Me to Us

Conscious Connection Back in September, I made a decision to start a practice of intentionally exploring my conscious connection to my husband. I was trying to walk the talk of what I tell my clients. I did this by starting each day with a prompt that gave me an opportunity to think about and then […]

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Creating a More Intimate Relationship

A recent survey on marital satisfaction found that out of 101 adults who had been together as little as a year and as long as 42 years, intimacy rated higher than passion. Sure, passion is important and reigns supreme on the list of ingredients for a happy relationship, but it’s no more important than intimacy. […]

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Discover a New Way to Love

Hello! Let me introduce myself: I am Anne Contee. Together with my husband Barry Contee, we invite you to join us on a lighted-hearted journey of healing and deep connection. I am a storyteller and enthusiastic facilitator. My optimistic, self-confident view of the world is not merely one in which the glass is half full, […]

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Will I Ever Get My Needs Met

Can You Give Me what I need? Being in a committed long-term relationship is the hardest thing we do. Individuals in a relationship boil down into two distinct categories. You can call them Pursuers and Withdrawers, Minimizers/Maximizers or the-one-who-is-eternally-Disappointed and the-one-who-lives-in-fear-of-eternally-Disappointing. It all boils down to the same fears: “I am never going to be […]

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“I love you” Calculus

Mentality {(Need for Romance + Security) > (Fear of Rejection)100} -Memory {(Declaring Love led to Intimacy last time) ÷ (That relationship ended badly)3} × Anxiety (Will she/he reciprocate?)10 √ {(Is this bad timing?) +Intuition (I’m getting a good vide.)} × (Courage + Nerve ± Recklessness) = “I love you.”* What does it mean to you […]

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Stop Shoulding on Yourself!

 Interactions with other people wire the brain for resilience. This dharma talk parable illustrates how interactions can be positively and negatively encoded in the brain.  A seven-year-old boy and his family are having dinner at a local restaurant. The waitress, addressing the boy, asks “What would you like, hon?” And the boy cheerfully answers: “I […]

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Intimacy, a REAL adventure!

Do you ever dream of a beautiful exotic getaway with intimate moments of delight? The adventurous intimacy that you yearn for is not as far away as it might seem, but it’s not always easy to get there. You have to visit your partner’s world–not their office or their hometown, but rather their private inner […]

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The Possible Marriage

My favorite marriage experts agree on at least one thing: The modern marriage is front-loaded with so many expectations for personal fulfillment that marriages often collapse under their own weight. In her popular TED talk, psychotherapist and author Esther Perel observes, “So we come to one person, and we basically are asking them to give […]

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Do as I Do, Not as I Say!

“Do as I say not as I do.” Children mirror parents and peers, fans mimic favorite celebrities, and art imitates life. We know that people learn by watching others. Actions really do speak louder than words. 100’s of billions of neurons make up the brain. Neurons connect with other neurons in what we call brain […]

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To Differentiate or Not To, that is the question.

“What do you want to do?” or “Sure honey, but what do you think about it?” Have you ever tried to encourage a friend by reminding them of all the great ideas or qualities they have, just to have each of your reasonable suggestions or compliments met with all the ways their current love-interest has convinced them otherwise? Somehow the […]

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