Giving and Receiving

What if you made a daily practice of giving and receiving? What would it be like for you to be intentional about your connection to your partner? Why not spend December giving gifts of your self and receiving all of the gifts that you are offered. This means receiving praise, compliments, and offered help. It means giving things that are not tangible, wrap-able or purchased on Amazon.

Make a list today of caring behaviors that you would joyfully receive, no strings attached. Give the list to your beloved and let the gifting begin! Intentional acts of kindness are an amazing foundation in our relationship. I am so grateful when you do things for me because you know I will be happy that you did it. Knowing what I want to receive makes doing it a win|win proposition. Offer caring behaviors DAILY! #imago #imagorelationship #imagorelationshipstherapy #iloveyou #consciousconnection #tellmemore #imagodialogue #imagowisdom #couplesgoals ...

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Getting the Love You Want workshops help couples transform their relationship. Tens of thousands of couples worldwide have attended this Imago weekend workshop for couples based on the best-seller Getting the Love You Want by Harville Hendrix, Ph.D.. This lively, experiential workshop will help you turn conflict into opportunities for healing and growth. You will explore some of your emotional history to understand its impact on your daily lives and gain compassion for your partner’s story. You will leave the weekend with fresh insights, new skills, energy and hope to restore the commitment and romance in your relationship. Please join us on this powerful journey! Registration link in bio. #imago #imagorelationship #imagorelationshipstherapy #iloveyou #consciousconnection #tellmemore #imagodialogue #imagowisdom #couplesgoals #attachment #authenticity #spacebetween #gettingtheloveyouwant @carolineberhardtlanier ...

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Changing the world one connection at a time! I love it!!#elpaso ...

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My brain is always looking for actionable information. The "don'ts" are immediately forgotten and the potential action seized upon. So when I worry about something, I imprint it as an action in my brain. My brain treats thinking about it the same as if it actually already happened. Memories, imaginings, and events are all the same to the brain when it comes to response and chemical messaging to my body. This is why visualizing positive outcomes can be so powerful. My worry creates expectation and what happens next is influenced by what I expect, especially when it is exactly what I don't want. Focusing on what I want, asking for THAT, and expecting you to be capable and willing to hear me and meet me is a completely different approach than worrying about the train wreck of the future. The train is still on the tracks...that's it. Imago relationships invite us to build upon abundance not scarcity: what I want, how we fill the space between us with joy, appreciation, gratitude, play, laughter, forgiveness, acceptance, curiosity, understanding, and love. #imago #imagorelationship #imagorelationshipstherapy #iloveyou #consciousconnection #tellmemore #imagodialogue #imagowisdom #couplesgoals #attachment #authenticity #spacebetween ...

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When our interactions are healthy, we relate well to each other, we survive our ruptures, and repair our connection. We do this using dialogue, appreciations, and caring behaviors. These are our Imago building blocks. One thing I appreciate about you... Help me understand you, tell me more... #imago #imagorelationship #imagorelationshipstherapy #iloveyou #consciousconnection #tellmemore #imagodialogue #imagowisdom #couplesgoals #attachment ...

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My choice.... When I am irritable, restless, and discontent I am likely to be reactive. My go-to reaction to your behavior, that bothers me, is to shut down, or in effect, erect a wall of silence around me. What if I held up a mirror instead...what I think I heard you say.... Is there more? Perhaps I don't like what you said. And I may not agree with you, but I can probably come to understand you and see how you makes sense, if I listen to you. Mirroring is my best predictor of my best listening. "Mirror, mirror, not a wall, I am listening to it all!" #imago #imagorelationship #imagorelationshipstherapy #iloveyou #consciousconnection #tellmemore #imagodialogue #imagowisdom #couplesgoals #mirror #youmakesense ...

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"Between a stimulus and response is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and freedom. The last of human freedoms is to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances." Viktor Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning How I respond to the issue at hand...is the issue. The space between us is both sacred and fragile. What I put in this space comes back to me, multiplied. In an Imago relationship, I am able to fill the space as I choose. When I am consciously connected to you, I choose to be attached and authentic-- both are safe! #imago #imagorelationship #imagorelationshipstherapy #iloveyou #consciousconnection #tellmemore #imagodialogue #imagowisdom #couplesgoals #attachment #authenticity #spacebetween ...

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When I say intimacy, I mean the emotional connection, tender touch, and engaged interest we show to each other. And by separateness, I mean coffee|tea, salty|sweet, hot|cold, neat|messy, funny|serious, musical|artistic, dark|light, max|min, you|me. We are a classic Imago match! You bring into my world that which I lack. You cross over to me with your differences and THAT makes us better, stronger, closer. #imago #imagorelationship #imagorelationshipstherapy #iloveyou #consciousconnection #tellmemore #imagodialogue #imagowisdom #couplesgoals #caringbehaviors #appreciations #youdoyou ...

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When we said: "We do," we pledged to do this thing called marriage. Our hardest times are often our closest times. That happens when I am able to listen to you and understand you. When I stay on my side of the street: I let you do what you need to do for you, ask for what you need, trust your processing and respect your pace on bouncing back. And you do this for me. I am available to walk with you on the bright sunny days, as well as, the darker ones. This is what we do. #imago #imagorelationship #imagorelationshipstherapy #iloveyou #consciousconnection #tellmemore #imagodialogue #imagowisdom #couplesgoals #attachment #wedo ...

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I was not born with my beliefs or experiences. I learned by receiving. In this way, the beliefs I formed about who I am and how I show up were learned starting the moment I existed. Sometimes what I sensed or felt to be my truth was not appreciated or acknowledged and so I adapted to get what I needed most...a connection to the people who mattered most to me. This is fundamental development. We carry with us a childhood learned set of beliefs and adaptations that may or may not work well today. You are my chance on reworking them and perhaps giving me what I long for most. #imago #imagorelationship #imagorelationshipstherapy #iloveyou #consciousconnection #tellmemore #imagodialogue #imagowisdom ...

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Having a regular check-in dialogue is a great way to take the temperature on our relationship. Check-in Dialogue (send | receive & mirror) First Sender Something I appreciate about our relationship today… (first receiver: What I think I heard you say...is there more?) Something I need you to know/hear today…(first receiver: What I think I heard you say...is there more?) Something I want more of in our relationship today…(first receiver: What I think I heard you say...is there more?) Something I need to do or say for my own wellbeing today…(first receiver: What I think I heard you say...is there more?) Something I appreciate about having this dialogue with you today…(first receiver: What I think I heard you say...is there more?) First Receiver One thing you said that was really touching (intriguing or surprising) to me...(first sender: mirror what you heard...is there more?) Thank you for sharing with me. Switch roles; Repeat! ...

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#mirrorofintimacy @alexkatehakis If you don't get her daily meditation, you don't get it! June 26 The process of questioning, like any activity, requires moderation to be healthy. Without moderation, questioning can turn self-devouring, where the question itself becomes a means of avoidance and dissociation. Questions can be manipulative, as if asking enough questions might almost resemble caring. Questions can be used to distract from the real issues, from really being seen and experiencing real intimacy. There are also those questions that are really statements, serving only to confirm fears, doubts, justifications and assumptions. Such leading questions create their own reality. How you respond to questioning can also reveal various defenses and deep-rooted patterns. This might mirror your schooling or upbringing: Were questions asked and answered in a healthy way? Or did you practice counterfeit ways of asking and answering? If you learned the art of inauthentic communication very young, and practiced it and honed it in adolescence, should you be surprised that it would seep into every relationship? The reason we ask and answer any question is to invite truth to come into consciousness--truth that is beyond our grasp at the moment. It is an act of faith, a way of surrendering oneself to the fact that we're human and don't have many answers, but we may receive them. True responses to true questions are more than intellectual information; they bring a shift in consciousness. #imagodialogue #imago #iloveyou #consciousconnection #intentionalrelationship #appreciations #tellmemore #questioning ...

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When we said: "We do," we pledged to do this thing called marriage. Our hardest times are often our closest times. That happens when I am able to listen to you and understand you. When I stay on my side of the street: I let you do what you need to do for you, ask for what you need, trust your processing and respect your pace on bouncing back. And you do this for me. I am available to walk with you on the bright sunny days, as well as, the darker ones. This is what we do. #imago #imagorelationship #imagorelationshipstherapy #iloveyou #consciousconnection #anewwaytolove #caringbehaviors ...

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Just take joy! Joy and sorrow sit side by side. When I take joy, even in the midst of my sadness, I am resisting my human nature to seek out the negative. Every time I choose joy, I add one more micro shift in the natural wiring of my brain. Harville #gettingtheloveyouwant Hendrix says that what we see in others is how they will behave. When I see you through my lens of joy, you are all of your true magnificence and laughter and generosity and integrity. You are the man I love, my life partner, my soulmate, my best friend, my darling beloved. What I put into my relationship comes back to me in an unending cycle. Today I choose joy. #imago #imagorelationship #imagorelationshipstherapy #iloveyou #consciousconnection #tellmemore #imagowisdom #joy #love #youaremysunshine ...

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#corinnaluyken Look into my heart. Hear me, see me, get me. Imago dialogue is the framework that reminds me that we can safely talk about the things I carry most deeply in my heart. #imago #imagorelationship #imagorelationshipstherapy #iloveyou #consciousconnection #listeningisloving #tellmemore ...

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...when I do that I feel.... What about you? What can you say that is good about you today? Share with me so that I can respond to you! #goodfeels #goodtherapy #imagoappreciations #tellmemore #onedayatatime #imago #imagorelationship #imagorelationshiptherapy ...

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Attachment equals safety, not love, not security. My attachment to you is about a consistent or reliable sense that you will be there for me when I turn to you. You will be there when I return from where I have gone. You will see me and accept me as I am. And you will remain at my side or have my back when I stumble or fail. And I do this for you. This is the bond that we seek, which translates into the experience we call our relationship, our love, our connection. In order to grow, I need it to be safe enough to feel vulnerable with you and risky enough to walk towards my fear and pain. The safety supports the risk. #imagorelationship #imagorelationshiptherapy #imago #iloveyou #consciousconnection #intentionalrelationship #appreciations #tellmemore #imagodialogue #imagowisdom #couplesgoals #attachment ...

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"Every bad feeling is potential energy toward a more right way of being if you give it space to move towards rightness." I love this quote! Embracing all.of the feels that dwell within me is the path to true healing and wholeness. When I move out of my lizard brain and into my rational brain, there is a chance that I will actually hear you and understand what you say or do. As long as fear or survival are guiding me, I am not thinking! When you mirror my fear with curiosity and kindness, I calm down and say what I mean! #somaticmessages #imagorelationship #imagorelationshiptherapy #imagodialogue #imago #iloveyou #consciousconnection #intentionalrelationship #appreciations #tellmemore #ventralvagal #sympathetic #parasympathetic #polyvagal #brainscienceforcouples #couplesgoals ...

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PSA: EXHALE! It resets the nervous system and invites us to be present, curious, and connected. #breathingisnotnatural #selfregulating #iamokay #exhale ...

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The work we do in therapy is healing old wounds, past losses, and unmastered developmental hurdles. In Imago Relationship Therapy, we do this healing work in partnership. Your partner is a mirror, revealing the very moments of vulnerability that you have for decades sought to hide or protect. You have a chance at a "redo," learning new ways to navigate old territory. The growth experienced now seeps into every relationship you have. The value of all you do in Imago Relationship Therapy is downstream as well. Do this for your children and your children's children. End generational patterns in your relationship today. #imagorelationship #imagorelationshiptherapy #imagodialogue #imago #iloveyou #consciousconnection #intentionalrelationship #appreciations #tellmemore #itsallgift #afgo #soulmates #ithadtobeyou #couplesgoals ...

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