How emotional awareness can shift the energy between you
Ever get caught in a moment with your partner and think, I don’t even know what I’m feeling… I just know I’m upset?
Or maybe you’re on the other side of it: your partner is reacting strongly, and you’re left wondering, What in the world just happened?
Big feelings tend to take over when they go unnamed. They drive tone, energy, and reactivity, and often create confusion for both people.
Why Naming Feelings Helps
In Imago, we slow things down and get curious — with ourselves and with each other.
When we name what we’re feeling, something softens. The nervous system settles. The emotional fog begins to lift. Even saying something like, I think I’m feeling hurt, or I feel kind of alone right now, can shift the dynamic significantly.
And when you’re the listener, the act of imagining what your partner might be feeling and gently naming it is a profound way to show care.
Try This:
Next time you feel overwhelmed or reactive, pause and ask yourself: What might I be feeling right now?
And if your partner is the one reacting, try: What might they be feeling?
Then take a gentle guess, like: I imagine you might be feeling frustrated… or maybe left out? Is that what you’re feeling?
You don’t have to get it exactly right — caring and reaching out are the gift.
A Final Thought:
When you name it, you tame it. And when you bring curiosity to your partner’s inner world, you help create the emotional safety that allows connection to grow.
Reflection Prompt:
What emotion tends to go unnamed in your relationship — hurt, fear, sadness, shame?
How might naming it, for yourself or with your partner, create more connection?
Reach out to us at the Imago Center DC – we’ll help you turn reactivity into understanding.
Want more tools like this?
Catch the video version on Instagram here.
And don’t miss the next post in our Imago Moments for Couples series!