Write a New Narrative!

The beginning of the new year is a fascinating time. It’s an invitation to begin again as if embarking on a new journey with a fresh start to (re)create, (re)construct, and (re)adjust your paradigm for the year ahead. After two years of disorientation with great losses and major transitions, significant life changes propels you to identify a new way forward. This new orientation begins with creating, imagining, and visioning the possibilities.

A Road Map

Your vision becomes the roadmap that inspires the potential of where you can go. When you are intentional about creating a vision, you can construct a new narrative for living. The word “vision” usually refers to the future, but in Imago Therapy, vision is defined as a transformed “present.” Revisioning is an invitation to shift from reviewing the painful past to creating an alternative to your current situation.

Annual Review

This process of revisioning I facilitate with both the individual clients and couples that I see. It is also a personal practice that my husband and I engage as an annual review for the fourteen years we’ve been married and will celebrate in two days. Every new year we set aside a few hours to reassess and create our vision for that year, asking, what is the vision for the life we want this year?  

A New Narrative

This question helps you to define your relationship goals and create a new narrative for what can be the game changer in your relationship if you’re intentional about doing the work.   

The relationship vision process encourages you to write down your narrative, to get a clear sense of what you want. This is a moment to dream, to activate your imagination, and consider all the possibilities of your heart’s desire, allowing your ideas to flow without judgment and criticism of past challenges.

SMART goals

Once you and your partner create a vision that you are both in agreement with, the next step is to get more specific about what you want by breaking-down your vision into a set of S.M.A.R.T goals. The breakdown is naming, Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Timely actionable items that support your vision. I will also add that it’s important to note your motivations, naming why these goals are important. You may find yourself needing to remember your why if you hit a wall and your momentum begins to fade. Lastly, you may want to list a few actions you need to take that will help you reach the goals you identified. This is the integrative process for turning imagined experiences into creating specific concrete behaviors.  

Your Relationship Vision

The narrative you create is the story that guides your relationship in achieving its potential. Your relationship vision is a place you can always return to when you get off track and need a boost to keep going forward.  If you can conceive the narrative for your life and keep that image active in your awareness, you can achieve it by the intentional choices you make align with the vision you created.

Choosing to create a new narrative today will make your tomorrow more intentional and meaningful.

If you are struggling in your relationship or having difficulty navigating your journey, we’re here to help. Check out our virtual and in-person Imago Relationships Therapy and Imago Relationships Workshops.

Hendrix, H., & Hunt, H. L. (2021). Doing Imago Relationship Therapy in the Space-Between: A Clinician’s Guide. WW Norton & Company.