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How to Use Conflict to Connect and Grow in Instead of Wound

As soon as my couples get serious about using conflict to grow rather than to wound or make the other "wrong," things change quickly and dramatically. In the attached article (click link below), Brian Gersho writes, "If you were to witness a healthy couple disagreeing on an issue, it would be hard to determine that they were having a difference of opinion because of the how skilled they are in having a respectful discussion/disagreement."



The Problem with Relationship Advice

The Internet is a wealth of information. You can get medical advice, relationship advice, learn how to cook and really find anything you need. Some of the most popular viral articles these days are ones on relationship advice. As an Imago relationship therapist I can't help but click on an article posted in my social media feeds that promises some sage advice on how to fix, save or create the perfect relationship.  Read more »

Can I Live Without Negativity in My Marriage?

What Has Love Got to Do with It???

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Why Marriage Matters to Gay Couples

Only a few states grant gay couples the right to marry and in states that do so many gay couples have rushed to exercise that right.  My partner of sixteen years and I tied the knot soon after marriage became legal here in D.C. in 2010.  Early in our relationship it felt risky for me to claim him as my “partner.”  Now I’m trying to get comfortable with calling him “husband.”  Read more »

Kim Kardashian, narcissism, and weddings

I recently read an article on CNN called 'Narcissists want weddings, not marriage.' The article discusses the hoopla around the Kim Kardashian/Kris Humphries marriage (and now impending divorce) and how it relates to narcissism. Since Kim Kardashian's announcement of a divorce after 72 days of marriage, I have read plenty of articles and blog posts on narcissism and weddings.  Read more »

Relationship Advice:10 Tips for Choosing the Right Partner

I was recently inspired by Dr. Barton Goldsmith's, '10 Tips to Help You Pick a Good Partner' featured on Psychology Today.  As a compliment to his tips, I wrote my own version called  '10 Tips for Choosing the Right Partner..' I hope you will find it informative and insightful!

Vision Quest Imago Style

 At some point in the early days of our marriage (it was 43 years this summer) my husband and I started writing down 5-year plans. We’d go out to dinner with the purpose of brainstorming and we’d have fun putting our heads together to envision our lives together. We’d write down stuff like buying a house, changing jobs, having another child, landscaping the yard, traveling, getting a dog, and the like. I loved that we did this and always took pride in our purposefulness and focus.  Read more »

The U.S. Economy Needs Healthy Marriages

The National Marriage Project of the University of Virginia examined demographic data and issued a report that concluded that U.S. economic growth depends upon healthy marriages and stable families.  The report entitled, The Sustainable Demographic Dividend, says that when people marry and have families several sectors of the economy are affected such as health care, household supplies and services, personal and life insurance, child care, among others.  So companies like Proctor and Gamble, Target and Home Depot are negatively impacted when fertility rates are down.  Read more »

In-Laws' Agendas Stress Out Mixed-Faith Couple

In this month's Murphy's Love advice column, the religious agendas of some in-laws-to-be are cramping a mixed-faith couple's wedding style. We also finally answer the question, "Do I need therapy?" 

Read the full article here.